Oct 20, 1812
Miss Bingley encounters Lady Catherine
LADY CATHERINE
Excuse me, young lady. I need to see the mistress of the house immediately.
MISS BINGLEY
May I help you? I'm Caroline Bingley, sister to Charles. I suppose I'm still the mis--
LADY CATHERINE
I require a more suitable accommodation, if you please. I've spent the last two nights in a room no larger than a closet.
MISS BINGLEY
Well, I'm sure we can find --
LADY CATHERINE
I'll need a room large enough for my daughter and myself with a lady's maid for each of us and it'll have to be thoroughly dusted and scoured first.
MISS BINGLEY
Um, certainly madam.
LADY CATHERINE
"Bingley" is your name? I take it that you're also losing a close relative to the Bennets.
MISS BINGLEY
I'm afraid so.
LADY CATHERINE
It astounds me how these Bennets are able to cast a spell over everyone.
MISS BINGLEY
Their mother has them quite well trained.
LADY CATHERINE
...Anne doesn't seem to care.
MISS BINGLEY
...Heaven knows which families their two remaining daughters will infiltrate.
LADY CATHERINE
...I suppose Darcy could have chosen worse.
MISS BINGLEY
...I wonder if Colonel Fitzwilliam is arriving soon.
LADY CATHERINE
...Who the devil is Anne in love with?
MISS BINGLEY
You know, ma'am, I'm doubly cursed by the Bennets. Not only am I losing my brother to Miss Jane Bennet, but her sister has also won the hand of the man I had been hoping to marry.
LADY CATHERINE
Do you mean to say that you wanted to marry Wickham?
MISS BINGLEY
Oh, heavens, certainly not. I meant Mr. Darcy.
LADY CATHERINE
What? How many young ladies has Darcy been making promises to?
MISS BINGLEY
Well, I certainly never received any promise.
LADY CATHERINE
Does he have a hussy in every county?
MISS BINGLEY
A hussy?
LADY CATHERINE
I hope you realize how futile your efforts have been, young lady.
MISS BINGLEY
Well, if it hadn't been for Miss Eliza Bennet then I think I was in an excellent position to secure him. I've been a close companion to him for several years, you know, and he's my brother's dearest friend.
LADY CATHERINE
My dear young lady, Darcy was intended for my daughter.
MISS BINGLEY
Oh dear, you must be Lady Catherine de Bourgh.
LADY CATHERINE
Well of course I am.
MISS BINGLEY
Oh dear.
LADY CATHERINE
If you think my nephew would've chosen some fancy London hustler over my daughter then you've got your bonnet on too tight.
MISS BINGLEY
Well, he fell in love with Miss Bennet in any case.
LADY CATHERINE
Take me to my room please.
The next dialogue: Miss Bingley encounters Lizzy
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